'[I'm] putting my relationship on the line for a cat': Grandparents suddenly abandon their cat of 2 years, in response, their granddaughter's boyfriend threatens to end their relationship because she is refusing to take care of the cat

The way that your partner treats cats is a hard line in relationships. It can be the make or break. And ending a relationship over the way that someone treats cats is a completely valid reason in our opinion. If your girlfriend thinks you're too attached to your cat and breaks up with you over it, then good riddance. If your boyfriend demands that you get rid of your cat because of him, then you better be getting rid of the boyfriend instead. If your boyfriend breaks up with you because you like you cuddle your cat at night… well, we're sure the cat was a better cuddle partner anyway. 

All that brings up the question: is the boyfriend in this story right to break up with his girlfriend over a cat? Are his accusations that she is not doing enough to save the cat valid? Is he doing enough? We're not sure. You tell us what you think about this situation. 

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Author image for Mariel Ruvinsky Mariel Ruvinsky
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  • 01

    "[Am I overreacting] for putting my relationship on the line for a cat?"

    "I said I won't talk to her until Tommy is safe, and if he [isn't], then that's it for us"
    via Unsplash / Sven Mieke

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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  • 02
    First I should say that I (26m) was raised with two cats, twins, who currently live happily with my mom. I moved to a different country now so I don't get to see them very often but I do miss them dearly and love all animals.
    via johngarcia95
  • 03
    My girlfriend lives in a different city and shares my love for cats, or so I thought. Her paternal grandfather and grandmother adopted a kitten named Tommy that they found in their garage and Tommy is the sweetest cat ever.
    via johngarcia95
  • 04
    He doesn't mind being picked up AT ALL, leaves his stomach open and sleeps like a baby in your arms; none of which my cats would do, but we loved and respected them either way. Apparently her grandparents planned to gift her Tommy, but unfortunately neither of us have the conditions to keep a pet.
    via johngarcia95
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  • 05
    Fast forward almost two years, the grandparents just woke up one day and decided to abandon the cat. They live in a remote city that doesn't have a typical animal shelter, but there are vets and they could literally wait to find a new owner but no, they left him out on the street next to where their son (my gf's dad) works.
    via johngarcia95
  • 06
    Cheezburger Image 10517399808
    via Unsplash / Sven Mieke

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 07
    My GF casually mentioned this, she didn't know that a domesticated house cat can't suddenly start living on the streets, so I told her that they need to find a new owner for Tommy ASAP.
    via johngarcia95
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  • 08
    It has been three weeks. At first, her dad found someone to adopt him but I kid you not they returned in a week because "I got dog instead".
    via johngarcia95
  • 09
    My GF visited her dad's workplace yesterday; the cat still loves her, came rushing to her and slept in her arms. She sent me a video but guess what, Tommy's eye is now injured. Her dad said he thought he saw him get into a fight with another cat.
    via johngarcia95
  • 10
    This triggered me. I scolded her and told her to find someone ASAP. I looked for vets and volunteers that act as shelters in their city and suggested them to her. She got two calls from potential owners but one of them was in a remote city, far away and didn't want to come pick it up.
    via johngarcia95
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  • 11
    So today she went there again (with my strong suggestion) to meet the other potential owner who came by. I told her that if it didn't work out she should just take Tommy to a vet we found online who could keep him until a new owner is found. Money is not an issue, I am more than willing to pay any fees out of my pocket.
    via johngarcia95
  • 12
    Tommy was sleeping when the owner came by but in the end it didn't feel right (the guy refused to simply take some photos for us in a week to make sure Tommy's doing OK). My GF stayed there for a couple of hours, couldn't find anyone else, and went back home.
    via johngarcia95
  • 13
    ZAG PURRREECT OSWJ
    via Unsplash / Sven Mieke

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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  • We understand the stress of the situation. We would be worried in the exact same way. But at some point… words are just words. If you care for this cat as much as you do - and we believe that you do - then you could take action, do something about it, take the situation out of the hands of those who you believe are not doing enough and… do enough. 

  • 14
    I got furious, I told her that there's no guarantee he will survive today. What's worse, I asked if there were any new injuries and she said his leg now also seemed hurt. I got so mad that I cussed her family (specifically paternal) and told her to go right back and take Tommy to the vet NOW.
    via johngarcia95
  • 15
    I said there's a chance he still won't make it or gets put down for his injuries, and she is partly to blame. She was crying and told me that she did everything she could (I disagree) and that I'm overreacting. I said I won't talk to her until Tommy is safe, and if he dies, then that's it for us.
    via johngarcia95
  • 16
    So now I hope for the best, but this is one of the few very serious fights we've had. She understands where I'm coming from and we are generally really compatible with each other, but her paternal family has always just been terrible, which she also agrees.
    via johngarcia95
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  • 17
    She thinks she's trying her best and I should cut her some slack but I think there's no excuse; it's extremely lousy to just wait to see a cat you've known for more than a year get injured and potentially k lled for absolutely no reason. Am I overreacting?
    via johngarcia95
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10517400064
    via Unsplash / Sven Mieke

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 19
    Update: Thanks for all the comments. I didn't answer all but wanted to give an update. So my GF brought Tommy to the vet as I "strongly" asked her to do so. Her dad also decided to join her while nagging why is it so important.
    via johngarcia95
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  • 20
    The vet saw Tommy and found an eye injury as well as a leg injury. He prescribed droplets for his eye and only when the vet told my GF's dad that "you can't just leave a neutered and vaccinated cat on the street like that, he'll di "did the dad finally stop complaining. The cat was given temporary shelter until a new owner comes by, but we are still involved.
    via johngarcia95

  • We say again: you can do something about this beyond just writing about it online. Take the cat yourself for a while, start looking for people to adopt it if you can't do it yourself. 

  • 21
    I agreed to pay for all the above, but I did let her know that the cat would have been completely healthy if they (she and her dad) had simply cared sooner; she made regular visits there (it's a Cafe) and saw Tommy about twice a week since he was abandoned.
    via johngarcia95
  • 22
    We put another local ad online for a kind owner to take him despite his injuries, but in the meantime we bought the droplets and are taking care of him.
    via johngarcia95
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